


The Llama that saved the Day

by The_Prism



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Crack, Other, Team TARDIS, but it was worth it, this is the dumbest thing I've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-09-16 01:19:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9267368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Prism/pseuds/The_Prism
Summary: I recently read this comment, saying that you could ship Captain Jack with a llama and it would still make sense! So, uhm... yeah.(You had it coming!)





	

**Author's Note:**

> I seriously apologize to everyone who reads this... WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? Anyway, hope you enjoy and please do forgive the grammar mistakes.  
> Allons-y!

They were running... again. Running for their lives on some far away planet (none of them had actually bothered to find out the name of said planet), trying to reach the safety of the TARDIS - nothing new there. The three people were quite accustomed to running by now seeing that the one currently leading the way usually ended up in some kind of trouble, as if the Time Lord had an inbuilt detector for such situations.

Not that his companions usually minded but right now they were being chased by an unknown alien creature that probably wanted to eat them and were really not in the mood for fun.

The thing that hunted them didn't seem to be particularly intelligent or tall, in fact it had some semblance to a bear, but it's long razor sharp teeth and claws more than made up for that.

"Can't you do something?!"  
The shout came from the blond, female member of the trio, though it wasn't directed at anyone in particular. Any idea on how to slow down the alien-bear-thing would have been gladly welcomed by her.

"Sorry, Rose", her friend, Captain Jack Harkness, shouted back.  
"I'm sure I would be able to shoot this... whatever it is... if _someone_ hadn't thrown my new blaster into the nearest ditch upon arrival."

Here, the ex-Time Agent glared at the Time Lord running in front of him who didn't even bother to turn around as he responded:  
"Why are you blaming _me_ , Jack? I wasn't the one who woke it up, was I?"

Rose rolled her eyes.  
"Useful lot you are", she muttered under her breath and tried to run faster to stay ahead of the creature. Couldn't those two stop bickering for just one moment? Their lives were at stake, for goodness' sake!

The Doctor had promised to take them on a harmless vacation for a change and so when the two humans had stepped out of the TARDIS they'd found themselves on a big meadow amidst a herd of peacefully grazing llamas. While exploring their new surroundings the Doctor had launched out into an explanation that 'no, you humans do not inhabit the only planet with llamas in the whole wide universe' which was followed by various stories from Jack who told about the time he landed on Dimrale 7, a planet ruled by intelligent llamas. According to him the 'people' there had been most interesting... whatever that meant.

However, that unspoken law had been obeyed again, one thing led to another and so the three time travellers came to be on the run back to their ship.  
"How much further?", Jack called out to the Doctor as they reached the tree line and burst out of the forest.  
"Just a little! I can already see her", was the reply.  
  
Over his heavy breathing and drumming heartsbeat, the Doctor could swear he heard a low, distant rumbling beyond the few hills of the surprisingly vacant meadow but that could just be the rushing of his own blood in his ears.  
"Come on, just a few more metres", he yelled over his shoulder.  
  
That was when Rose cried out behind them and the Doctor and Jack spun around to see her lying in the high grass, her foot seeming to be stuck in some kind of plant.  
  
The rumbling had become louder by now, closer, but it went unnoticed by the two men who watched in horror as the bear-thing leaped at Rose, claws extended towards her and teeth gleaming in the sun. It didn't come far.  
  
Well, nobody would come very far if they'd been trampled down by a gigantic herd of panicked llamas. At least now the mysterious rumbling could be identified as the sound of a lot if hooves... Rose managed to free her foot and ran over to her traveling companions, embracing the Doctor in an overjoyed hug while Jack jumped into the air, cheering.  
  
He noticed one of the animals coming to a stop near the little group as the herd started to calm down and with an exclamation of "Oh, you gorgeous thing!"  
the jubilant former Time Agent bounced over to it, pulling it's head down to plant a long kiss on it's muzzle. The llama instantly pulled back in what was probably surprise and confusion but with it's head thrown back, it's ridiculously wide eyes and flaring nostrils it looked downright distraught.  
  
Rose stared at the scene before her, gaping slightly.  
  
"He did _not_ just..."  
  
The Doctor beside her shrugged a little with his arms crossed.  
"51st century, Rose. Remember their flexibility."  
  
The companion shook her head slowly, her mouth still a little open, as she gave her reply:  
"I don't care what century he's from. _That's_ not normal."  
  
Meanwhile, Jack started to give the llama (which hadn't moved an inch) a contemplative once-over and the Doctor decided that it would probably be the best for Rose's mental health to get her into the TARDIS at this point, so he gently guided her by the shoulders to the not very distant ship. After she had disappeared through the doors he turned back to his other companion who by now had engaged in a conversation with the animal.  
  
"You are not by any chance related to Queen Miila of Dimrale 7, are you? 'Cause you've certainly got the looks."  
The llama turned it's head away.  
  
"Jack!", the Doctor called, eyebrows raised and nodding his head towards the TARDIS to indicate that they were leaving. Jack looked back and forth between the Doctor and the llama as if seriously torn between the two but after a few moments he whispered "I'll call you", winked at the animal and then jogged past the Time Lord through the ship's open doors.  
  
Closing them silently behind him, the Doctor shook his head, sighed and wondered how long it would take Rose to overcome the mental trauma she had surely received.  
Well, it was going to be a _long_ week.


End file.
